Elsa de Romeu blog vérité libre géopolitique
People pleasing Love relationship

If you want a Real Relationship, Stop being a People-Pleaser
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“People-pleasing is about manipulation & deception, and it’s not healthy in any relationship.
People-pleasing is extremely damaging because it’s based in dishonesty.
In turn, it hampers true intimacy.
The clinical term is sociotropy. Sociotropy is defined as “a person’s tendency to place an inordinate value on relationships over personal independence that will leave them vulnerable to depression in the response to a loss of relationships.”
People-pleasers usually have an underlying self-esteem/self-worth issue that makes them feel the need to hide their beliefs & feelings from others,
or assume they are “not worthy” enough to be shared.
They frequently say Yes when they should say No.
They try to avoid conflict as much as possible because they don’t want to/don’t like to deal with the uncomfortable feelings of others.
They can also often be great chameleons, blending into any social environ.
Lastly, they will go to great lengths to keep others happy, which usually means they resort to dishonesty & deception.
People-pleasing was one of my many survival tools growing up.
“People-pleasers have a history of maltreatment & somewhere along the way, they decided that their best hope for better treatment was to try to please the people who mistreated them.”
Love Couple

What a Healthy Relationship looks like
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” In order to be able to love & receive love, you have to love yourself first.
Loving yourself in a sense that you are independent.
You know how to cheer yourself up, look after yourself, explore your hobbies & interests, spend time with your own circle of friends.
Often times, you see someone getting lost in their relationship.
Sure, they are happy with their partner – but they’ve lost their friends & their entire world revolves around their partner.
When this happens, you have an imbalance in a relationship.
To be in any sort of relationship where you do not express yourself, simply to keep the peace, is a relationship ruled by one person & will never be balanced or healthy.
It’s ok to ask partners for favors. However, it’s another thing to almost expect them to serve you all the time.
Healthy relationships CHOOSE to communicate with kindness even in the most difficult times. ”